Amy and the Weevils

Amy and I being "sexy", at least ten years ago...

"No (we)evil lost is wailed when it is gone."

My sister Amy called me last week with some bad/gross news. She had been cleaning out her van - deep cleaning which involved removing all of the seats - and had found weevils in the wells where the seats clipped in. They were under all of the mats, too. GROSS, right?

That's just the tip of the iceberg, baby.

You see, Amy has a long and torrid history with weevils. It all started when they would infest her cornmeal and undermine her flour. They hid in every drawer and disguised themselves amongst grains of wheat.


Then one day she made herself a cup of cocoa, carried it downstairs to enjoy it in the dark while watching TV, and noticed that her cocoa had a definite crunch to it. Light revealed - you guessed it - weevils. In her cocoa. (And currently cruising down to her stomach)
GROSS, GROSS.

If I remember right, that revelation was the catalyst for a deep-kitchen cleaning.

Then there was the time that she went to air out her wedding dress. Guess what she found infused in the lining and bodice and in every pleat, tuck and gather??
Weevils.

So last week after the van-weevils, Amy told me that she was going to make nice with the weevils. Everyone has pet weevils, right?

I would like to insert here a little background on Amy. When I was in kindergarten Amy let me take one of her most valuable possessions to show and tell. It was a Nerful. Nerfuls are soft plastic toys that have ball-shaped heads that fit snugly between coordinated pants and hair/hats.I lost the head to one of her Nerfuls (believe me, she could tell you exactly which one it was) and of course the pants and hair are useless without head.

Amy hated me for years...until she went away to college and I started high school.

You see, that is determination (considering I'm such a nice person, right?).

So, making "nice" with the weevils??

We'll just see about that. I bet she takes a blowtorch to the van, garage, kitchen, etc...

I should also tell you that she is my best friend now. And the most motivated, energetic, creative person I know. And the only person I know who has ever roasted marshmallows by the fire of a controlled burn in Flagstaff. Ah...another story for another day.

Weevil lover...